Friday, February 27, 2015

A Cracker

Language is always something evolving. New words are added. Old ones are lost. Occasionally you come across a word you are surprised about because you did not know it. Two nights ago I was surprised that R was not familiar with the word hipster. It is such a loaded word, and lordy, if you add beard in front of it, a bearded hipster, it can be thoroughly derogatory.

I thought the name came from hippies, but as R said, the only hipster I know is the low rise pants. Hipster pants of the seventies? That is what is is all about. I am generally not so keen on hairy men, and I remember the warnings of my childhood, never trust a man with a beard, but I find some bearded hipsters pretty hot.

Oh, I meant this to be be salient and I ran off on a tangent before the third sentence was started. While waiting for the lift one day with Sister and Little Jo, I began the rhyme in reference to which lift would arrive first with Eenie Meenie,  Miny Mo, Catch a Nigger by the toe.

Sister: "Brother, you can't say that".

"What?"

"It is tigger, you can't catch a tigger by the toe."

"What's a tigger?"

Yes, as I often am, I was being a little disingenuous.

I feel in Australia, we can get away with saying the word negro, but probably not nigger. Well, maybe not really negro either. Is black person offensive?

This is not a word familiar to me but I have learnt about it. Its origins are when black slaves on plantations were hit by a whip to make them work harder or as a punishment. Crack the whip, the person who cracked the whip was the Cracker and white.

In modern terminology, black people would like the word cracker to be a term like nigger, derogatory.

Allow me you to give you a context, and if US readers are also rolling their eyes and not knowing about cracker, then I am probably way off key. I do believe that cracker is a word among popular black culture in the US though.

"Come to the party bro".

"I ain't goin' man. The room will be full of crackers."

Thursday, February 26, 2015

Oh my, it's just too big

How big is Australia? It takes about five hours to fly east to west or north to south. If you are flying to Australia from the direction of Europe, do not bother touching up your lipstick and putting on your hat and gloves as you cross the northern Australian coast. You probably still have a way to go yet.


The placement of the overlay of Australia on Europe amuses me. Perhaps this is Australia's European take over plan. Let me explore my plan.

Seems some Portugal is ok, but most of it isn't. I hope we have the bit where Nandos chickens are farmed and there are cute little trams. We don't want the Spanish Mediterranean beaches or the Rock of Gibraltar? I think we've got all the vineyards in though.

Yes, we can well live without Sicily and the Italian mafia in the south. Have we got Venice? Not sure from the map. Fair Italians in the north are a bit more like us, so good that we have them, especially as they actually work for a living. We can retain the name of Italy for our bit and the rest can be renamed Bunga Bunga Land.

Oh dear, poor Tasmania with only sea and a bit of Egypt. Tasmanians aren't really used to deserts and Moslems, and looking at their own Sphinx will do their heads in, both of them.

Way cool, we have lovely green Ireland but without the troublesome Northern Ireland and it looks like we aren't taking on that huge social security and health care drain on the public purse, Scotland. Deep fried Mars Bars, followed by a fag and a glass of scotch indeed.

I've got a theme happening here. How many countries can I insult and stereotype?

Most of Norway is in but sadly not all of the southern fiords. Where is Findus? Plenty of fish fingers for all. Ah, maybe that is in Abba Land next door. Well, anyway, we have Mary back in Australia with the inclusion of Denmark. Finland, not much point to having that now that Nokia is but a shell of its former self.

I'd like to exclude Russia as it could be very dangerous for our PM to cross the Ukraine border and shirt front Putin from there.  But if we moved the map left, we would bring back in Scotland and Northern Ireland. We'll just call the Australian bit of Russia a de-militarised zone and that will keep the Ruskies out of Ukraine. Err, do we really want Ukraine? Ditto Latvia, Lithuania, Belarus and Estonia. Would they be useful at all? Ever?

Melbourne was once the third largest Greek speaking city in the world. Well now Greece is in Australia, they can all go home and help pay off their homeland debt, and no you can't take your Aussie pension with you. Can supply ouzo, olives and fresh fish.

Switzerland, gold bullion, pretty cows, chocolate and funiculars, great. Cuckoo clocks, nah. The gnomes of Zurich will be useful though.

Poland, once we have dug up all of our coal, we will embrace Poland and dig up theirs. Possibly they could build a ship for us in Gdansk. 

Germany, a Mercedes for all Australians and high speed roads to smash them up on and feel great schadenfreude when we do so. Mrs Merkel can be in charge of administration and sit at the front desk to welcome and charm visitors.

Belgium, not necessary. We will run Europe from Canberra. Thanks. Collect your pay on the way out.

Netherlands, we'll just let them be smoking their bongs and they'll be no bother at all. They will all eventually cycle into a canal while stoned anyway, so their numbers are really self limiting.

Slipping south again, Bulgaria. Beautiful women and hot sunny beaches. Not interested in either.

Turkey? Almost a good example to the world that Moslems aren't so bad. Almost.

A little north, Yugoslavia. All those countries that fought and changed their borders and names in the 1990s, bugger orf. I wouldn't be so harsh if I could remember what was what used to be and what is now.

Except for whatever country Prague is in this week. It can run the Euro/Aussie public transport. 

Hungary? I believe it will be quite useful to be employed to deal with gypsies and provide opera. As a punishment for homophobia by the state, the parliament house in Budapest on the banks of the Danube will become a wedding chapel for gays. 

England, well it ain't the economic powerhouse it used to be. We'll just National Trust classify the whole place and leave it for tourism.

The elephant in the room? France. What to do with France? Our local media reporters will never get used to the idea of not reporting the bed hopping of politicians. What can we get from France that we can't get from another European country, apart from a nasty rash in an embarrassing area? Two years ago the best champagne was produced in England. Snails are to crushed underfoot, not to eat. I don't know. As for eating fungus grown on tree roots known as truffle, quelle horreur. Any suggestions?

If your country has been left out, that is because it is not important enough to bother about.

Ah, but there is one significant one I have left out, Strudel Land, and so Austria will be my personal country and I will rule Europe and Australia from Vienna. I did see a very nice palace there and I think the Highrise furniture would blend in really good.

Almost every post I write is for you to read. Today I just wrote one to just amuse myself. 

Wednesday, February 25, 2015

A win after a consumer back lash


I would judge this as a consumer win. If you have forgotten, the story was that Glad's Cling Wrap had the metal cutter on the bottom of the box removed and replaced by a serrated cardboard cutter on the lid. Apparently the metal cutter can be very dangerous, and that was their argument and it was nothing to do with cost cutting. I expect the same mother company produces blister packs, that can slice through your skin at the drop of a hat when you try to open the pack.

I mentioned the matter here when I was very cross at the change and then discovered many other people were also cross with the changes.

Credit due to the company who did respond to so many complaints. Who is the company? It took some drilling down through minor companies and majors, along with takeovers. But I just knew it would end up with a big one, Procter and Gamble.

From Face Book, and the company does not actually say the metal cutter will be restored.

Glad Australia
Following the overwhelming amount of feedback we have received, we are pleased to announce that we are going to change the cutter bar on all our Cling Wrap products back to its original location.
We are also maintaining the stronger box, the 50% better cling, the tighter seal, the easy roll start and easier box opening.
Our intention has always been to give consumers a better quality product, a better experience and better value; however, our loyal consumers have spoken passionately about the new packaging and this is something we won't ignore.
Once more, we would like to thank you for all your comments over the past few weeks. Our team will be working day and night to get the new product to people as soon as possible, so please bear with us and we will confirm timings very soon.
Thank you.

Tuesday, February 24, 2015

Mine is bigger than yours

I have been comparing Victor's nearby erection with my own. The original front and rooms of Albert Park Manor are being kept but the rear was demolished. There are demolition photos and information about its former purpose back here. The graffiti on the hoardings has since been painted over.


A crane was needed to put a crane in place.



A well paid job, I should hope.



Grace has now left the room.


See the bloke out towards the end.


Counterweights need to be added.


Pretty well complete now. I have never taken too much notice of cranes and I assumed, without thinking about it, cables ran to the end bit, around a pulley and then down to the ground to pick up and lift. Not so these smaller cranes. About half was along the horizontal blue bit (sorry about the tech jargon) is a thingie with pulleys. It can slide back and forth and that is what does the lifting from down below. I guess it is controlled but when the crane is without an operator, he moves itself around according to wind direction. At times when in use, the tower part sways back and forth.


Work has progressed and a few concrete floors have been formed. This one had just been poured.


Instead of just one height been done as had been, the latest is these very tall walls were lifted into place. I would guess this will be the height, plus roof top equipment. Note how the new wall wraps around the side of the original part. No one from the ground will really see that. There has obviously been some effect on the apartment building next door, but remember there was and old part of the hotel at the back that was demolished.


This small building sits next the old Manor and where the windows are papered was our local cafe for many years, especially in our early times here when not very much was available nearby in the way of food and coffee. After a couple of changes of ownership we stopped going there. It had lost its 'feeling'. Next door is a convenience store and apartments above which I don't think are occupied now as it is about to be redeveloped with a tall extension at the rear. I am not quite sure where at the rear as there is very little space.



Monday, February 23, 2015

The degaying or Musical Monday

If you burrow into my personal effects, my bedside cupboard, my wardrobe and ever so certainly the computer hard drive, we could be discovered as a gay couple.

But essentially we are just two mates living together. We have degayed our lives in our older age. Not every gay couple does. I recently heard of a a very long time couple sending a plea to our government to be allowed to be married. I admire their passion, but it is not for us. Never mind that the ever so not teenage John Gray in Wales is about to marry his male partner.

We are just happy together, living in many ways independent lives but with each other. 

But god forbid that I would forget Valentine's Day, which I see as a commercial construction in Australia. Ditto Halloween. Valentine's Day wasn't something that happened in Australia until recent years, well not that recent. There was a time when the tabloid newspaper had almost a lift out booklet of personal messages for Valentines Day. Now it is a couple of sheets.

It was quite early in the morning when I had to rise for work on the 14th of February and as expected a card with a chocolate greeted me on the kitchen bench. I replaced the card with mine to R.

I rolled my eyes when I saw R's card, and thought, too damn late for that sweetheart, but as his salutation inside said similar to my thoughts.

My card. I am so not the hipster that I may want to be.


R's card. It made me feel very sad. I am scared and frightened that he might not be around forever and I am scared and frightened for him should I not be around. Many have trod the path before and survived, but it is not something you look forward to.


So what is love? Haddaway said it clearly enough so many years ago with a minimal of lyrics.


PS This was begun as a post about something else with only the first paragraph written. Let us say it evolved.

Sunday, February 22, 2015

Just another Sunday

This almost meets my definition of Sunday Selections. River who does the same, has a different one I think.

While I had to work, there was nothing to stop R attending Non Dreaded Nephew's house warming  and birthday party in central Footscray. NDN and his partner put on a terrific afternoon for our side of the family and R enjoyed himself very much and it is so good that all of my family include him.

NDN had been given a gift of a voucher to use the temporary water slide in Lansdowne Street, East Melbourne and intended using it the next day. We had a couple of things to do in town and so thought we would wander down for a look. I thought we would catch an 11, 12 or 109 tram and walk to the top of Lansdowne Street, but alas there was something going on, with most trams using Latrobe Street instead of Collins Street. A 48 tram was arriving so we caught that and left at the bottom of Lansdowne Street.

We walked up the hill, not at all noticing the hundreds of bare topped men. To me it seemed a little tame but once up at the top it was clear there was a long queue and people were really enjoying the take off. Naturally the males of the species had to show off and launch themselves dramatically down the slides. The three laned slide was about half a kilometre long. I'd imagine by the afternoon on such a warm day, the queues would be half a kilometre long.




Ok, one for you straight blokes.


As well as there being tram works interrupting the Collins Street tram service, it seem there were train City Loop works as well. I really should read the tweets that arrive on my phone from public transport companies more closely. We were looking like lost tourists at Parliament Station and a kind station staff person asked if we needed help. It's a nice day to be above ground, she cheerfully encouraged us. C'mon love, it is a two minute trip. We  aren't going to miss much sunshine. In essence, no loop trains to Melbourne Central, which explained why the display boards were not making any sense to us. Any notices anywhere? No that I saw. Ah well, walk and catch a tram back into the town. The bonus for you, or maybe not, is more photos.

I had not noticed the Park Hyatt before. I rather liked it. This is not the main entrance though.



This is the main entrance. While not especially tall, the hotel has a very large footprint.


Ood sculpture. What is it about?


Righto, it represents a petition put to State Parliament for women's sufferage.


I think there are five of these old tram shelters remaining. One is still in a state of disrepair but the remainder have been restored and gated. Good heavens. Homeless people might be tempted to sleep in them. Can't have them lolling about making things look untidy


Within this 50s art deco theatre fa├žade is a Victorian theatre with all the ostentation you would expect in a 1920s theatre. Sadly, the demolishers began their nasty work without a permit and the interior has been quite damaged. How a proposal for a six storey hotel for the site in a low rise area was ever approved, I do not know. How you get a new building approval before a demolition permit is issued is also odd. There has been a strong Save the Palace campaign to save the building and things seem to be on hold at the moment. Fortunately it was last used as a live music venue, so the kiddies are onboard the campaign too, including my Non Dreaded Nephew who has become quite an activist.


The Imperial is a very old Victorian Hotel. While was it not built as a hotel, it began its life as a pub in 1863, around decade after its construction.


More public transport woes, no buses in Lonsdale Street because it had been taken over for the Greek Antipodean Festival. N.B. No Greek or European Union taxes were used in the making of this festival.


Lordy, it is a busy city now. Busy enough that weekend but this weekend is/was the White Night cultural festival where the city pretty well does not shut down at all on Saturday night and 800,000 are expected to visit over the night. Then Sunday is the Chinese New Year celebrations in Little Bourke Street, which will spill into other streets.

Friday, February 20, 2015

The Guilty Mum

How myself and my siblings survived childhood remains an utter mystery to me. Dire threats were only made about going on the roads, staying away from water dams and never going into a paddock where there was a bull. Otherwise, we had pretty free reign. I think at about 12 years old we were finally allowed to cross the road on our own.

Little Jo at the age of nearly 8 can easily pick our tramstop as we approach in the tram. I remarked to her that she will be able to travel to town on her own soon. No, she replied. I won't be allowed to until I am a teenager. So that is much the same as my own parents' road rules. Otherwise, compared to the lives her mother and uncles lived as children, she is very protected from any threat or danger. I can't imagine her being allowed to roam alone in the bush or climb 25 metres up a tree. I expect if the dangers of dieldren and asbestos were known, there may have been a few more rules for we children.

Of course, the loss of one child if that is all you have would be absolutely destroyingly devastating. Had my parents lost one child, at least there were still three more. I don't mean that to sound so harsh, but it is true.

River made an interesting point yesterday about babies with wet nappies. Nappy, diaper if you like, companies would have us believe that as soon as a baby is wet, it is in great discomfort and the nappy should be changed immediately, preferably for a very expensive ultra absorbent. I'd not thought about it really, but of course a baby doesn't know they have wet their nappy. They won't be uncomfortable. River expresses it well, so take a quick read.

Making parents feel guilty makes a lot of money for retailers and suppliers of baby goodies. The Guilty Mum was an ongoing segment in ABC's brilliant tv show The Checkout.

Here is a clip.


Thursday, February 19, 2015

Tosh

Not much to say today. This was meant to be a much larger post but I can no longer be bothered. I can't even remember what Marcus posted that I was supposed to add here. He does find a lot of nonsense and tosh in public transport areas.

Now the Victoria Line, which has 213 million customers, can see faults in real-time remotely, and can assist engineers as well as deploy fixes from control rooms. The line’s improved signalling system allows it to send 33 to 34 trains past London’s platforms an hour, almost one a minute.

Not by my clock, that would be one just short of every two minutes. What horrible writing too.

I am obliged to Marcus Wong for this one.

???

Sports commentator discussing the Tour de France: 'People say the French are rude and arrogant, but that is just how they are'. He did not mean what he said, I am sure.

Wednesday, February 18, 2015

Who you gonna call?

In Australia for an emergency we call 000. Even if your plan has expired on your mobile phone, or you don't even have a SIM in your phone, you can still call 000.

The European emergency call number is 112. My first mobile phone in the nineties could not call 000, the Australian emergency call number, only 112, and as an incentive to upgrade the phone to enable it to call 000 I was offered a new and nicer aerial for my phone. I travelled by a couple of trains to Laburnum Station where the business was and the business gave me the new aerial and fixed the phone so it could call 000. R picked me up as he worked nearby and we went to Box Hill and had an early dinner at a Chinese restaurant called Sunny Court. The restaurant served pho before pho had a name in Australia.

The sister of Victoria's former Premier Ted Ballieu, one Kate Ballieu, now a heritage activist on the Mornington Peninsular, recounted in her The Age newspaper column of her experience when her neighbour's terrace row house in North Melbourne caught fire, and she dialled 999, the English emergency call number. Yes, if you were a young person and read a lot of books written by English people, 999 might have been at the fore of your mind.

Before I stopped watching American tv shows, there was a show about an emergency service. I can't recall the name of the show, maybe something like Dial 911. Goodness, I can almost recall the hot actor in the show. I should know his name. From that show I learnt that 911 is the number to call in the US. Sorry US peeps. I don't think 911 will work here and I don't think the British 999 will either.

000 works and so does the international 112.

What do more minor countries use? What a nightmare of a hotch potch. There are too many to list. Even  New Zealand uses a different number, 111. Generally 112 is the number to try first if you don't know. Phone systems in different countries may automatically redirect the call to the local number.

The world can't get its act together on weights and measures, digital and analogue broadcasting systems, copyright, not even date format. It's a wonder we can even send a letter to another country. What hope is there for a standard international emergency number.

Tuesday, February 17, 2015

Indonesian Games

Indonesia seems to be ready to murder in cold blood two Australian citizens because of their drug importation offences.

I will call it now. It won't happen. I don't understand the mechanisations that are happening, but I don't think they will be killed. An alternate view of mine is that maybe they will be killed, which will go down really well for local Indonesian voter consumption. Everything like this must be judged by constituent votes.

ABC Melbourne radio breakfast broadcaster Red Symons made an interesting point this morning. He had watched a movie about an English hangman, who hung hundreds of people in the 30s and 40s, including those convicted at the Nuremberg trials post WWII.

Those who the English hangman hung were not alerted in advance to their demise. They were quickly removed from their cell and hung, all happening within a minute and were immediately dead.

Yes, while murder by the state is bad, to take those about to be murdered by vehicle to an airport, fly them somewhere, then transport them by ferry to an island where they will be shot dead must surely be classed as a cruel and unusual punishment beyond just shooting them.

Later edit: Dealing drugs is not direct murder. Blowing up and killing Australians and locals in Bali is, yet those who did that are now free from gaol in 2015. Indonesian values must surely be called into question.